November 1, 2018

Aglow — All Saint’s Day 2018

Today is All Saint’s Day — a Christian festival in honor of all the saints, known and unknown. This year, I remember my mother, who died last January 6. I miss her. I wish I had known her better. I wish she had known me better.

DAY OF THE DEAD by Barbara Crooker

November 1st, the veil thinner, and we remember
those who’ve gone to the other side. Don’t worry,
I say, I’ll be there soon. But for now, I mark the presence
of their absence, an ache in the throat, a finger
on memory’s pulse. Light candles to keep out the dark,
to mark a path, should they wish to return. The floating world
shimmers and ebbs. I’d like to cross over, just for one hour,
see my mother, hold my baby, talk to Clare. Perched on our shoulders,
the dead ride with us, teetering like pyramids of water skiers, forming
enormous wings. Their words, though, remain inaudible. Cold syllables.
They scratch maps in frost on dark windows, but no one can read them.

Cross the threshold. This night is ancient and long. Whisper in my ear,
tell me what the new year will bring. Look at how the candle uses up
its wax. See how the smoke rises in the hearth.

My mother on her 1st birthday, September 1, 1929.

My mother in April of 1993 when she was 65 — the age I am now.

My mother, December 27, 2004.

My mother, July of 2016.

Whisper in my ear, tell me what the new year will bring.

OPENING POST PHOTO: Greenbelt Lake, 11:30 a.m., Halloween 2018

15 Comments

  • What a lovely tribute to our mother, Sharie. I miss Mom, too. Mom enjoyed all the Christmas movies on the Hallmark Channels. We watched many of them together when I would visit her. I’ve been watching them pretty regularly since they came back on at the end of October. Watching them are bittersweet. I love all the pictures of Mom, especially on her first birthday. xoxoxo

    • Thanks, Merrie Lee. I have to confess that I don’t think I’ve ever seen any of those Hallmark Christmas movies. Head hanging low, I also confess that I don’t like the movie, “It’s A Wonderful Life.” Mom would undoubtedly be mortified. That being said, I never miss that Charlie Brown Christmas special, the Rudolph the Red-Nose Reindeer special, and, of course, the Grinch special.

  • Love the poem. Barbara Crooker is astonishing. I was really drawn to the picture of you and your Mom. Maybe I am reading too much–and the two of you are standing together without being together. You look open and for some reason she does not. I wish also that it would have been possible to know each other better.

    Since you asked I too will name and remember my Mom, Agnes.

    P.S. Happy Anniversary on Halloween

    • I don’t think you’re reading too much into that photo, Charlotte. My mother was really never comfortable having her photo taken, especially with me. I was struck yesterday as I was creating this post that I could not find ANY photo of my mother between her high school graduation and the one posted here taken in 1993 — that’s a span of about 47 years.

      And, of course, God bless Agnes.

  • FYI — in the P.S. of her comment, Charlotte wished me Happy Anniversary. Forty-five years ago on Halloween, I experienced a Christian conversion. I am careful with whom I share that because I don’t want my Christianity in any way associated with the Christianity espoused by Trump evangelicals.

  • Remembering the victims of the Squirrel Hill synagogue massacre last Saturday:

    Rose Mallinger (Holocaust survivor)
    Jerry Rabinowitz
    Cecil and David Rosenthal (brothers)
    Daniel Stein
    Richard Gottfried
    Joyce Fienberg
    Melvin Wax
    Bernice and Sylvan Simon (husband and wife)
    Irving Younger

  • “a finger on memory’s pulse”

    I’m always so grateful for this day to remember. I’m remembering two Mrs. Petersons today. My mother, Leonore Adele Klaassen Peterson. A woman not prone to emotional displays or to saying things like “I love you.” But there was that tear that rolled down her cheek as we sat talking in our living room just weeks before I was to marry and leave her. I’ve never forgotten that.

    I’m also remembering the Mrs. Peterson whose “little light” shone so brightly in your young life.

    Very nice to see these pictures of your mother–and the beautiful picture at the top of this post. Captures for me so well the somber beauty of this special day.

  • Remembering Gwendolyn, whose friendship was a part of the glue cementing my friendship to you.

Comments are closed.

Discover more from Spark and Spitfire

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading